Effin Barney

so.. Jay has been dropping the F-bomb around the house, but in a non-sequitor type of way... so we thought maybe he was saying something else, or didn’t know what it was, or whatever. So, we ignored it so he didn’t say it just for the reaction, assuming he didn’t mean it.

Today, we learned different.

He was done eating lunch, and attempted to crawl out of his high chair. As he stood up, he fell back, and ended up butt first in the seat, with his arm and legs out of the top, on the tray. What was his reaction? That’s right. The F-bomb about three times, before calling for his mom.

Great, my not-yet two year old talks like a sailor.

Hot Wing Sauce at its best

Dani's Delux Savory Sauce

1 bottle of HOT CHIX hot wing sauce
1 stick of margarine or butter
1 tablespoon of honey
1/2 teaspoon of yellow mustard
2 tablespoon of heinz 57
1 teaspoon of salt

Pour entire bottle of HOT CHIX into sauce pan
cut butter into 3 sections and add to sauce.
Stir in remaining ingredients
Cook on low for 10 min.

If sauce is too hot, add more butter
if sauce is not spicy enough add 1/4 tsp of Tabasco or Chalula sauce.

SB Commercialism

All Ads, and my thoughts:

1. Bud Light: Office - Its alright. I wasnt expecting to see them tearing up the office, but why was an intern hiding beer, and why did he expect the exec to appreciate it?

2. Burger King: Whopperettes - Excellent. Very funny, over the top silly, the stacking on the burger was laugh-out-loud. Musical without grating on my nerves. very nice. Love seeing the "freaky king."

3. Sierra Mist: Airport - Yawn. Sierra Mist always seems to think their commercials are funnier than they actually are. Must be a Pepsi phenomenon. It was a cute commerical for april, but during the superbowl? bah.

4. Bud Light: Hidden Fridge - Nice. The praying was a good sealer to it.

5. Movie - blah, why bother?

6. Toytota: Camry - Wow, how better than me you are, speaking two languages and driving a hybrid. Too bad no one told you that you'll have to drive it for 12 years to make up the difference in price of a hybrid. Oh, and the battery wont last that long, and it wont be covered under warrenty. Screwed!

7. FedEx: Cavemen - Thats funny! "not my problem" The stepping on was a little much, but overall funny.

8. Bud Light: Camping - OK. The bear wants a Budlight? How did they guy get away? Well, seeing the 'yoink' was surprising and funny. Not the best Bud ad, but it was ok.

9. Another movie.. does anyone make movies that aren't sci-fi-comic-booky anymore? Blah.

10. Diet pepsi: Brown and Bubby - Terrible. Has pepsi ever commissioned a tollerable ad ever? At all? They fail more assuredly in the Super Bowl than the public mass transit system.

11. Aleve: Mr Nimoy - I suppose if you like Star Trek Wars or whatever sci-fi crap this is from, it was good. I did like the "i dont get it" aspect, folloed by the reveal, though it wasnt funny, so much.

12. Ameriquest: hospital - Excellent! Ameriquest is the new Budweiser! That killed him.. ha! It killed me!

13. Bud Light: Roof Grill - Very nice. This was two full gags, all in one. They could have split up the guy falling through and getting hit by his tool box to a whole separate commercial. Nice.

14. Diet Pepsi: Crap Fu Can - seriously, did Jay Mohr read these scripts before signing on? I guess Pepsi has enough money to make anyone do anything, no matter how stupid.

15. Disney: Cars - Hmm. I hadnt seen any previews of this before (were there any?) but i'm not... impressed. It seems ok, and I wanna (and will) see it... but i was hoping fo rmore. Oh well.

16. Budweiser: Streaker - Nice. I like the horses playing football gag. The shaved sheep was good.

2nd Quarter

17. ESPN Mobile - Uhmm.. OK. Its not like the service is really THAT great. Kinda cool visual, i guess. I just like my SB commericals like my movies, full of punchlines.. or at least punches.

18. Careerbuilder: Monkeys - Very nice. I love the little dance at the end. Pretty good.

19. Cadillac - Nice looking truck. I like the look of the new GM van-replacements. (I know they are SUVs, but they only exist so whiney little bitches dont have to drive minivans, like real parents should) Kind of creative to have it appear from the watery.. stuff. I like it. Car reveals in Super Bowl ads are kinda neat.

20. Dove: Girls - Good commercial, great cause, wrong audience. This is a drunken, amped up, party-atmosphere watching grown men obliterate each other int he name of advancing a ball. Not exactly the 'love the differences in little girls' venue. Though I appreicate the idea behind it, and would support it.

21.Movie – blah, blah

22. Ford: Kermit- Kermit climbing, singing, sees an suv, end commercial. Uhm… ok. Now Ford is hiring the muppets to shill its crap-fest of cars? Beautiful. Another beloved childhood institution perverted for commercial value. Blah.

23. Michelobe: Tackle – Not their fault, but is anyone else getting tired of seeing folks fall down or get hit for laughs? Yeah, me either. It was ok.

24. GoDaddy: Strap – Uhmm.. ok.. I like boobies, but this was just more of the same. Give subscribers the video of her showing those things bare, and I’ll move my hosting. Until then, good luck fielding all the calls from 6th grade boys, who are the only ones who’d be excited by what you can show in a SB commercial.

25. Movie – blah

26. Gillette: Fusion – The next one will have 9 blades! I do think the one blade on the back is a good idea, but otherwise, these things bore me.

27. Overstock.com – I was surprised to learn that this lady isn’t like, the wife of the owner or something. She’s a model they picked for their commercials. Shes ok, I guess, but not what I’d call hot. Plus, this commercial bored me. Yawn.

28. Disney: Disney – OK, walt was a great man, and I should go patronize all of their parks and buy their things, but I couldn’t pay attention through this whole thing. Someone tell me if it has a payoff at the end.

29. Sprint: locker Room – This was a dumb idea, that I’m surprised made it out of concepting, but it actually worked fairly well. I wanna throw my phone at someone’s face, then when it hits the ground and shatters into a million pieces, take it back and say, I want a new one, the security feature failed. I’m not gonna. But I want to.

30. United: Flight – A slightly cool, slightly creepy style, and a bizarre plot. I mean.. ok, I want to fly… do you have the best rate on Hotwire? OK, then I will fly your company. Save this money to discount your rates, people. Not funny.

Geez. This is a bigger undertaking than I thought it would be. Whew.

31. Disney: NFL – OK. It was alright, I guess… Steelers based, any surprise?

Wow.. OK, so that was the first half. Second half later.

Super Bowling

First, I didn’t care who won, I just like football.

If you evaluate an entity after an event and grade them by how well they performed, here are the grades I'd give:

Seahawks
Overall first half - B
Time management first half - F
Overall second half - B
Time management second half - F

If they had run the two minutes drill effectively, or hadn’t turned the ball over, or stopped Parker's run, or got some catches from Stevens, or gotten Alexander running more effectively, they'd have won this game. If this was a heavyweight fight that counted minute-by-minute instead of a football game with TDs and Field goals, they'd have won going to the cards. More often than not, they looked in control, with momentum. The Steelers had bright moments, but overall didn't look 'better' than the Hawks.

Steelers
Overall first half - C
Time management first half - N/A
Overall second half - B
Time management second half - A

The INT, trick play (that anyone should have seen coming from 30 miles away) Parker's run, and their last drive were the only time that the Steelers looked good. But they were enough to put more points on the board, and take the win. The best 4th quarter, time grinding drive I've seen in quite a while. Those first downs were killing the Hawks. Steelers should feel lucky they were ahead to run out the clock in the first place.

Refs - D-
I think there was no malice, no intention, but they missed quite a few calls. Seemed very sloppy to me. Where was Eddy Hocks? I don’t think anyone should ref any game ever, other than Ed. This game proves my theory.

The push-off was a terrible call to reverse a touchdown. He put his hand out, but didn’t push.

The holding call to push them back form the 2 was phantom. It didn’t happen… even Madden said so.

In football, there are three and only three penalties on a guy who successfully makes a tackle- Facemask, horse collar, and unnecessary roughness. Hasslebeck's chop call was terrible, and you might even hear the NFL own up to it. That penalty is there to keep guys from chopping blockers, to allow another guy to make the tackle. Hasslebeck dove PAST the blocker to make a great tackle.

And, thanks for the explanation from the ref on the Ben no-TD. "Play stands as called." Thanks. What did you see? Did you see him score? Did you not see enough to overturn it? What happened?

Overall, lots of calls were Bah-log-na.

Media Day Hype - D
OK, Joey Porter, settle down, tiger. Stevens said his team will win the game. That’s what everyone should say. That’s what YOU said in your media day. Why are you getting all upset about it? Oh yeah, it’s cause you are a hype master who needs the drama to make the news. How about make news on the field. Sorry, you didn’t do that either. So now, how about just shut up.

Media Coverage - C
OK, OK, OK.. I get it... Bettis is from here, Polomalu is awesome, the Steelers have won a super bowl before. Jesus Christoph. Enough already. Damn. Can we get a new story line? Get out of the Steeler's ass, quit over-hyping a guy who should have retired two years ago who didn’t do much for your team this year, and give me a break, Polomalu is a good defender. He isn’t the savior.

Commercials - C
This was not the year of the watercooler commercials. The Ameriquest ones were decent, the Pepsi ones were pathetic (as usual... I can't think of a single decent Pepsi ad ever) and AB wasn't up to par. One good fridge joke, but that was it. The Hummer ad was genius. I think the haters of the ad are Hummer haters and would have hated a Hummer commercial that featured a naked Jessica Alba making out with a naked Jennifer Gardner.

All performing artists - D
Horrible. I guess if you are 60, and can afford superbowl tickets, you care about the Moldy Stones, and you remember when Aretha had a voice. Frankly, they've got to fix the half time shows. Mtv failed too young, this year the Stones Failed too old. Not sure what the solution is. I watched all I could stand, then turned and watched a Simpsons rerun. What ever happened to alternative halftime shows? Didn't Beavis and Butthead do one? I miss that. Where was In Living Color when you need them?

My Wife's Wings - A
Super duper sauce she cooked up. All households should have a Fry Daddy for fries, wings, etc. Oven cooking what should be fried is just pathetic. Stop fooling yourself; you will love how your food tastes in the oil fryer. Not the healthiest of choices, but who wants healthy Wings? Bah!

6:00pm game time - A
Very nice work. Saw the whole game, and some post interviews, and still got in bed before 11pm. Thank you for the early start time. Until they make Post Super Bowl Monday a national holiday, they need to keep the game early.

Adonis